Everyone should watch this documentary. It was fantastic, informative and in some ways I guess could strike some as shocking. I am emotional so the fact that some of it made me cry isn't exactly news but it did. Having a baby is emotional, being pregnant is an emotional experience it all is. Not only for the Mama but for the Papa to, no one ever talks about that part but there is a great deal that no one ever talks about whether it be good, bad or indifferent. - Just watch it! :)
Last night I had a baby melt down! An "OMG She will be here and I am going to do it all wrong." kind of melt down. Stas looked at me with a grin trying to soothe me but at the same time being entertained by my emotional flip out. Its not something I do very often and he thinks its so cute, while I think its so pathetic. I said that she should stay where she is at, in my belly where its safe because what if I can't protect her from anything and everything. Then I stopped in my tracks, saying very forcefully "I am NOT staying pregnant forever." followed by laughing. Right now I feel like I am going to be pregnant until the end of time but she eventually is going to have to make her debut. Apparently she has decided that full term, is the way to go, all the way or nothing at all. Which is good of course. Besides after a while you kind of get use to being miserable.
I am nesting a bit, and then I feel bad because I get too exhausted to complete anything. Really whew I want to get this stuff done. I have to but with the extra weight on my body and the other wonderful hormones that loosen joints making everything all stretchy is making my injuries and so one flare up more then ever before. I again snapped my hip out of place, again I was wanting to scream bloody murder and again walking was a pain literally. My back also hasn't been too keen on working properly with the extra baby weight pulling on it. Ugh! - Yet in the end its all worth it.
Every ache and pain, every nasty tired day and every "blah" emotional moment is worth the end result of seeing my little girl, touching my little girl and bringing her home. I am waiting so impatiently.
I guess that is all for today. Its horribly foggy outside so I am worried about Stas tonight. He works until 1AM. Those who read this keep his safe trip home tonight in your thoughts please.
Good Night!
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