I am doing really well with this conscience decision to be happy and less uptight. Of course I am not going to be able to squash all concerns about an early birth being immanent or what might happen. However at the same time I refuse to willingly discard all of the joys and the blessed feeling I have at her existence. That would be foolish and I intend to be anything but willingly foolish when it comes to the creation of our babygirl. She is far too important to us.
Stas, bless his heart has got to be the best man I have ever found. I have never in my life met a man who is so supportive during difficult times. I complain, I bitch, I cry, I throw tantrums (adult ones) at the injustice of life and scream in pillows in reaction to my panicked worrisome personality. Stas, he rubs my back, cooks (he is doing tons better) me meals, works hard in and out of the home and coos me back to tranquility with kind words and sweet innocent caresses. All those things I claim not to need because I am so STUBBORN and RESILIENT, not lies I swear.